Another said, "You can argue which was the greatest athlete and the greatest teacher, but you can never argue which athlete and which teacher was the greatest man."
He was just my Dad.
This is my preaching to the choir sermon.
I do not need to tell you how great our
father, grandfather Double R was.
He was the Greatest of Humble Men.
When
we were children, we had our mother Ruth, and our father Double R to allay our
worries.
He is
gone. And we are alone.
He
lived a long and happy life.
The
blessing of a long life is also a curse to have to bury all your friends and
your wife.
He
lived twelve years without Mom.
The
many dichotomies of Dad.
He
could be gruff.
He
was known for his kind words.
He
cared.
He
was aloof.
He created
order out of the tangles of his mind with index cards.
He
let his mind create what it will.
Outside
of care for his family, he had two main modes – Working and procrastinating
about work.
He
thrived on action, He thrived on doing for others – Summer League, Sports Hall
of Fame, AmVets.
He
cherished his alone time, sequestering himself from the voices of the outside
world.
He
gave us gentle pats on the head and talking mouse holes.
No
one here needs to be reminded of his greatness because all of us carry his
greatness within us, that we cherish and cultivate as a little seed of kindness
in our own hearts.
He
was a child of the Great Depression. He
was a difficult child at times for his mother.
Yet Dad knew the austere joys of a good onion sandwich.
As a
child, Dad and his friends built a refuge from the outside world in a little
club house in the woods at the edge of the Grove.
He
landed in Pusan under artillery fire. He survived, but later, clubhouse buddy Bobby Kipp was killed in action.
Then
they made another landing, this time at Inchon, again under enemy fire.
Then
the war became a test of wills, on which side could control the hilltops. Many times, dad was stationed on lonely outcrops. There was safety during the
day. But at night, they feared the blood
curdling war screams and drums of the Chinese.
It terrorized the men.
Then
one day his C.O. called him in to tell him his father died. They shipped Dad home to be with his mother.
By
the time they sent him back in December, the First Marine Division was
completely trapped by the Chinese at the Chosin Reservoir. It was a blood bath. His buddies were in there, his cousin Nuny
Rabenold too.
He
was crossing the Sea of Japan for another landing. It was mixed company of Cooks and Bakers as
Dad like to say. They were told to fight
their way in, to save the Division.
But a
miracle happened.
The Division fought
its way out.
Dad’s buddy Gene Holland
was killed there. Nuny came
out with saucers for eyes and the thousand-yard stare, forever changed.
Dad
always said his father’s death, saved his life.
More dichotomies –
He
was the Greatest of Humble Men.
He
was forever the gloomy optimist, forever finding the good in bad situations and
people.
He
never gave up on us.
He
had many friends. Men like Doug Rontz, Randy Smith, Aaron Sebelin, Jailhouse Artist Tracey
Everett, Dennis Tredinnick, Kevin Binder, Chuck Hanna, Roger Aroyo, idolized our dad so much that they looked to him as a second father, sometimes the father they never had.
It was hard to grow up in the shadow of him.
It hurt to know that we shared had to share him with so many.
But that was among his gifts to the world.
Looking back, at all those that loved him like a father is a joy and blessing, a tremendous comfort now,
To
know that he was so loved, by so many, so deeply.
Dad
wrote these three quotes on the back on an index card EVERYDAY from 2014 and
2016 –
“One
in a Billion”– I’d like to think it was for me, but I think it was about our
mother.
“Whatever
you do, do it well.” He lived that.
And
lastly, he wrote – “What more do you want?”
I
ask all of you gathered here, what MORE do YOU want?
You
will never get another Double R pat on the head.
He
will never ever draw you another mouse hole.
He
will never snarl at you like a gruff and cagy dog ever again.
But
you do carry his seed of kindness,
the
one you have been cultivating in your soul since the day he made you.
The
seed has nourished us all
Like
the seed that nourishes the cardinal in the dead of winter,
Dad sung a special kindness from his soul,
Honor him,
Let
the energy of that seed seep into your soul,
And like that song of the cardinal,
Let it continue to flow into the world, out of you.
The
moon comes up.
The
moon goes down.
This
is to inform you
That
I didn’t die young.
Age
swept past me
But I
caught up.
Spring
has begun here and each day
Brings
new thoughts to the tangles of my mind.
On
Monday, I got a call from the outside world
But I
said no in thunder.
I was
a dog on a short chain
And
now there is no chain.
(Slightly revised from Jim Harrison’s
“Barking”)